There are so many things that can make a kick-ass relationship. Here are four of the biggest indicators that your relationship is on a great track.
#1 Your partner is curious about your life outside of your relationship
Why is being curious in your relationship so important? Well, when your partner is curious, it tells you that they’re interested in the things that you are doing outside of the things that you do together. “Showing interest in what I like or what I want to do shows me that my likes and dislikes are valued by my partner. When my partner asks me about things I like, it shows that my partner cares about my ‘stuff,’ even if it has nothing to do with her,” says an anonymous 30-year-old male in a committed relationship.
#2 You know and feel that you could talk to your partner about anything
“Oh, I can’t speak to my husband about that.”
Why is this so important? Well, similar to the above (being curious), being able to talk about anything is incredibly important in a relationship or marriage. Things come up in life. Tough things, fun things, stressful things, family things – and through all of this, it’s important that you can stand united with your partner. To do that, you must be able to talk to your partner about anything! Are there things that you feel you can’t talk to your partner about? Think about why you’re feeling resistant. Feel like you can talk to your partner about anything? GO YOU!
#3 Forgiveness and acceptance are more important than winning
No one likes to fight. It sucks. However, research shows that disagreements or arguments can be an opportunity to bring you closer together with your partner. Arguing about something, or seeing things differently gives you both a chance to express what your concerns are and come together to find positive solutions. When you are having a fight, it is easy to get caught up on “your side” of it, sticking to your guns.. not being able to let it go. Let’s face it, sometimes, we just want to win. I’m here to tell you that winning = your relationship losing.
Long story short: Don’t try to win. Try to listen, forgive, and accept. Work WITH your partner, not against them.
#4 Eye rolling doesn’t exist in your relationship
Relationship researchers Drs. John & Julie Gottman often discuss the “Four Horsemen of the Apocalypse,” which is what research tells us are the four biggest predictors of divorce (or breaking up). One of those four things is contempt. A word not used often, but being contemptuous can consist of name-calling or insults, super hostile humor, mockery, eye-rolling, and the biggest and most common culprit— tone of voice. By being contemptuous towards your partner, you’re essentially letting them know that it’s never safe to be vulnerable and that unconditional love and acceptance is not present in your relationship. So, if there is no eye rolling in your relationship, that’s a GREAT THING!
Something that you think needs to be on this list? Disagree with one of these? Join in the conversation in our incredibly supportive free Facebook Group. Also, if you want to kick even more ass at the communication in your relationship, check out our FREE Resource ⬇️